Dear Future Parents

Hey there future parents!

I'm writing this blog post to you to prepare you for one of the most important decisions you can make regarding the upbringing of your spawn: the naming.

The name you choose can affect your dependent in ways you can't even imagine. Naming your kid "Stinky" could give him the drive to revolutionize the deodorant industry, or such an intense hatred of humanity.. that… unthinkable things!

While the welfare and life of the child is important, what's even MORE important is how awesome the name would look in a history book. You should assume that your new lifeform is going to fully harness the power of the force (either the light or dark side) and will become the most famous person to have ever existed (or maybe even the first person to walk on Mars!). And they should be named as such.

Here are a few potential names, although I'm sure you can come up with better ones:
Optimus Prime
Leader of the Revolution
El Presidente
Al Dente
Burrito Supreme
Supreme Commander

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